Foot In The Mouth

We've moved!!!!

2008-12-26T19:50:00.001-08:00

same old stuff only more colorful!

www.likelegos.com

And check out my health blog!

www.girl-heroes.com

Of course!

2008-10-08T12:19:00.000-07:00

Last night when Brent was putting Noah to bed he said to him, "I love you so much."

Noah's response, "Of course you do. What father wouldn't love his son." Duh dad!

"love word"

2008-04-27T21:49:00.000-07:00

The other day I took Nathanael and Noah to Toys R Us to spend Nathanael's birthday money. After two hours, I'm not kidding TWO HOURS (who's says I'm not patient) of helping Nathanael to decide on what he would purchase, I hobbled on sore feet to the checkout line.

We were waiting in line when Nathanael asks very matter-of-fact as if he is asking me if I like ketchup on my fries, "Mom you're hot? Huh?"

"What?", I ask, caught off guard.

"Not hot like the temperature hot," he continues.

What? Where is this coming from I'm asking myself. Looking for someone to blame I immediately I feel like beheading Hannah Montana for corrupting my sweet innocent baby. I've never even seen the show, but I don't like that she wears a long blond wig when she has perfectly beautiful natural brown hair. It's just a disguise my friends say. I don't care. She could have chose those black plastic glasses with the plastic nose attached.

In the car I ask Nathanael a few questions to try and find out where he heard the word "hot" in that context. I also ask him if he knows what it means. He says he heard it at school. Then smiles and says, "It's kind of a love word, huh, Mom?"

"Yes honey. People say it when they think someone is really really beautiful," I say.

Then he says, "I sort of wish I would have gotten the remote control boat."

bicycle

2008-04-08T23:15:00.000-07:00

Noah: Bicycle from Jenn Nims on Vimeo.

"Christmas Cerelers"

2008-01-13T20:33:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I get sad. Sometimes I cry. And sometimes joy comes in the funniest of ways.

Reindeer.

Last week I was sitting at the breakfast table with Brent crying. There was no fighting just crying when two little reindeer trotted into the kitchen holding a sign that said "Christmas Cerelers". Nathanael and Noah had found some old Christmas reindeer antlers and they were singing the Jingle Bells chorus with the focus of a contestant on American Idol. When the chorus ended Nathanael launched bravely into the verse although it was clear he didn't really know the words. And Noah kept right up with him smiling and moving his mouth. The little reindeer finished their performance. As they walked out of the kitchen I heard Nathanael whisper to Noah, "At least we made mommy stop crying." Almost. Sad tears had turned to happy tears.

The Conversationalist

2007-08-14T09:35:00.000-07:00

Noah and I had a conversation walking to his classroom the other day.

Me- Do you like writing your name in class?

Noah- No.

Me- Why not?

Noah- It's boring.

Me- You know I heard someone say once that only boring people get bored. Are you boring?

Noah- Yes. And I'm not talking to you anymore.

Me- Why not.

Noah- Because you're boring.

Firsts

2007-08-13T22:16:00.000-07:00

Today was Nathanael's first day of second grade and Noah's first day of pre-k. I like firsts. First taste of a new ice cream flavor. First time seeing the Rockies. First time hearing an amazing song. First time driving alone in a car. First time stroking the muzzle of a horse. First buds in spring after a long winter. Firsts are fun. Well most of the time. First shots are not. First speeding tickets are not. First time being made fun of for passing gas in public is not, well unless you are a 11 year old boy. One of the best things about having kids is getting to exerience "firsts" again and again. Many which have been forgotten. Simple pleasures and curiosities such as the first time catching a lighting bug or first time building a river in the sand at the oceans edge to fill up your castle moat. The not so great first can be scary, but this time around I am approaching them with some, I hope, wisdom. And maybe...just maybe with some thought, compassion, and a whole lot of prayer some of the blows of those not so great firsts can be lessened or even dodged. And maybe my boys firsts will sort of erase and help me to unlearn some of the jaded attitudes I have picked up over the years. Instead of being a big black mark my cynical attitude will become more of a smudge. Thankfully, both boys came home excited about their first day of school. Nathanael said he had so much fun. And I could tell Noah felt bigger and more responsible. He's doing big stuff, sitting down and writing his name before he goes and plays. And I probably should mention, I had my own first. The first Monday in August where I was halfway organized, managed to complete some tasks with a pretty good attitude, sidestep depression, and remember other people are human beings just like me on a Monday. A good first day of second grade. A good first day of pre-k. A good first August Monday for mommy.

The Baby and The Bat

2007-06-15T07:22:00.000-07:00

Noah loves to play "The Baby". If you have played it with him you know "The Baby" can get intense. Thankfully he was a much easier baby than the one he pretends to be! The Baby started as Baby Bat. We'd lay in bed and I'd be Mommy Bat and Baby Bat would cuddle in his mommy's wings. I loved being Mommy Bat so much a bought a t-shirt with bats on it. They weren't serious bats though. Mommy Bat is much more serious than the bats on her shirt.

Enchihuahua

2007-06-15T07:05:00.000-07:00

Some call it lies. I call it imagination.

We are all driving home from the gym when Noah exclaims I saw an "enchihuahua!"

"You did! Where?" I ask.

"We just passed it", Noah continues.

"Are you sure?" Daddy asked.

"Yes, it was black," says Noah.

Being animals lovers, we turn around and start looking for the "enchihuahau". But there is not a dog in sight.

Noah says very seriously, "It went behind the building."

Fooled again...

I scream. You scream.

2007-06-11T23:08:00.000-07:00

We all scream for ICE CREAM. Today, Nathanael and I found a brand new, still in the packaging, Rival ice cream maker at the Goodwill store today for $3.99! That's less than one scoop with 3 mix-ins from Cold Stone. You would of thought I gave Nathanael the keys to his very own us Toy R Us when I said we could buy it! We brought it home and Brent was equally excited exclaiming, "It's new. It's even still in the plastic wrap," as he opened up the box. Mmmm...I want organic ;) homemade peach ice cream!

One Million Children Blog

2007-06-11T23:00:00.000-07:00

We are going on an adventure you can read about it here one million children

Tooth Fairy

2007-05-06T22:51:00.000-07:00

Nathanael lost a tooth yesterday. Here was his letter, ALL in his own words, to the Tooth Fairy and her, really his, reply to him.

May 5, 2007
Dear Tooth Fairy,
I lost a tooth and I have a big hole! I can fit a straw through it. I like having a big hole in my mouth. Have you ever lost any teeth? Where do you live? I’m hoping to get some money for my tooth. How do you get to our house? In kindergarten we thought you rode on a motorcycle to our house (that was not noisy). My teacher, Mrs. Stein, she read a tooth fairy story about you riding a motorcycle. I think you look very very pretty. Do you live in a mansion? I know that I have a lot of questions. Are you ok with that? Do you have a computer? Do you have a husband? Do you have Valentine’s Day and Christmas, and Thanksgiving Day and Easter? We like doing that. Do you have an office? Do you make lots of money? Do you have lights in your home?
Please answer these questions, all of them. Thank You
Love,
Nathanael Nims

Dear Nathanael,
I’m so happy to hear that you lost your tooth without actually loosing it this time… searching around the ditch at your grandma’s house was a lot of work!
I’m also glad you are finding the hole in your teeth useful by inserting a straw there. It must be nice to be able to smile & drink through a straw at the same time!
You like to ask a lot of questions, don’t you? That’s great. It’s so important to ask a lot of questions in life. I’m afraid I can’t answer all of them though, because some tooth fairy things are very secret. When I was a young tooth fairy I did loose my baby teeth, just like you. Then my tooth fairy came and took each tooth to our tooth treasury where we keep all our prized tooth collections. That’s so funny that you thought I rode a motorcycle! Ha Ha .That seems like a crazy way for a fairy to get around, don’t you think? I love to fly. I have wonderful fairy wings that carry me from place to place and keep me safe from harm. Thank you for your compliment, I think you are a beautiful little boy. My house is not large by human standards, but it is beautiful and peaceful and I love it very much. I wish you could visit but I’m afraid no human could ever venture there, it’s a secret!
I do not have computer, though I enjoy using the computers at the people I visit’s homes. In fact, I’m typing this on your daddy’s computer right now! These keys sure are hard to push though. I have to jump from letter to letter! I’m not married. I am a young fairy. We have different holidays from you but we do like to celebrate the birth and resurrection of our savior Jesus. We don’t call it Christmas & Easter though. I don’t have an office, my work is done in homes like yours where I find children’s teeth and leave rewards in return. We tooth fairies make a good living collecting and trading teeth. Of course I have lights in my home, I especially like to use candles.
Thank you for the beautiful tooth.
God Bless You
Love
The Tooth Fairy

Rock the Casbah

2007-05-05T22:29:00.000-07:00

We spent Thursday evening in Santa Barbara as family at our friend's, Casson and Anna, art gallery opening. http://galleryocho.com/ (There are some pictures.) Nathanael and Noah had fun time looking at the art in the gallery, eating chocolates, running around the fountain in the courtyard (which Noah fell into to...brrr.), eating chocolates, chasing other kids, and eating chocolates. After the opening, we decided to have dinner with friends at Chef Karim's, a Moroccan restaurant. For those of you who have never experienced eating at a Moroccan restaurant there are usually a few key differences. They typically wash your hands at the table. You often sit on the floor or on cushions or benches around a low table. You eat with your hands. And there is usually....a belly dancer. Which brings me to the point of this post. We had just finished our appetizers when the belly dancer came out to entertain us whirling and snaking around the room with her scarves and finger cymbals. A happy and playful dancer, probably about 50, she kept asking Nathanael and Noah to dance with her. Each time the looked wide eyed and shook their heads no as if asking them if they wanted to kiss a cobra. Across the room a large party of about 20-30 decided to liven up the restaurant and got up to dance with the belly dancer. At which point the host came over and asked me to join them on the floor. I reluctantly got up and after a moment motioned for my crew to join me. Brent got up to get his groove on and, as most of you know, Noah was then only a step behind. Noah ran up and began to dance and smile with so much joy that people who were having fun started having even more fun watching him. That's when Nathanael couldn't take it anymore. Nathanael, a usually shy child in public places, marched onto the dance floor and started doing a Moroccan version of the Can-Can. (He had just learned the Can-Can in music class that day and earlier that afternoon he had been busy teaching Noah the kicks.) The belly dancer was so impressed with his moves that she grabbed his hands and led him into the center of the circle of people. Always the artist, he danced his Moroccan Can-Can with the seriousness of a first chair violinist in an orchestra. He kicked and shimmied as hard and fast as his little body would go. When the music ended the room broke out in applause and he looked confused trying to decide if he should be proud and smile, or be embarrassed. Of course we told him how wonderful he was and then ate our meal of lamb, rabbit, chicken, and beef which was very tasty and satisfying. But not nearly as satisfying as spending the evening smiling and laughing with people I love and watching our little artist create the Moroccan Can-Can.

Star War Show

2007-04-20T21:59:00.000-07:00

A Star Wars show is not your ordinary night at the theatre. A Star Wars show is theatre at it's best. Darth Vader, played passionately by Nathanael Nims, battles Luke Skywalker, Noah Nims. They battle, dying and overcoming death again and again. And again. Noah Nims captures the complexity of Luke as he struggles not to be overcome by the dark side. His light saber although mostly blue, changes to red when the pressure to join the dark side becomes to overcome. Nathanael Nims taking on dual roles as Vader and the director, plays Vader with and an unmatched intensity. He astounds the audience with his amazing ability to direct and act at the same time switching roles seamlessly. You'll be at the edge of your padded seat wondering, "Who will win?"

Running at the Nims Family Theatre for one night only. To get to the theatre just follow the post it notes labeled "Star Wars Show".

Serious Shirts

2007-04-19T23:27:00.000-07:00

The other day, I noticed a kid at the boys school wearing a shirt with two pandas on the front. Not cartoony pandas. They were serious pandas, like photographs. He was leaning his back up against a tree with his long skinny twelve year old legs crossed as he watched other kids run around with each other. He was wearing basic jeans, basic black hightops, basic black sunglasses with a neoprene leash attached, and his deep red serious panda shirt. To me, he stood out among the Old Navy, Element, Gap, Volcom, t-shirt kids. A non-conformist. But not the sort of non-comformist who conforms to a group of non-comformists. He made me think of Toby from Jr. High. Toby always wore serious wolf shirts. Toby was a non-conformist too. He walked fast down the halls between classes. REALLY FAST, like was on the last leg of a power walking race, his expression more serious than the wolf on his shirt. I never saw him doing anything thing else except "Tobe-ing" down the halls. One time, I thought I would impress my friends and get a laugh so I stepped into his path on his way to class. BAM, I hit the floor. He ran into me like a car busting through a barracade in an action movie. He didn't even use his arms, just shoved me out of the way with the velocity of his torso barreling down the hall and never blinked an eye. My friends thought is was the funniest thing they had ever seen. Inside, I felt sort of bad for being an ass and, in a wierd way, I secretly admired him. Not for his social skills but for wearing serious wolf shirts when everybody else sported Hyper Color and IOU shirts. I like animal shirts, have quite a few, but they aren't serious animal shirts. There is a BIG difference. Maybe serious animal shirts will become the next identity of a new subculture. I wonder what sort of music the serious animal shirt group would listen to? I wonder where Toby is now?

Take 2...3...4...5...6...91

2006-12-23T20:21:00.000-08:00

production
Originally uploaded by bnims.

It's a wrap. Not really, but we did just finish our first day for the short film Brent and I are shooting. And it feels really good. For those of you who don't know, a few months ago, I set a goal to write and shoot a short film within a year. I was thinking that it would happen this spring, but the idea came for a quirky comedy and we had a trip to Indiana planned for Christmas so we thought let's just shoot then. It sounded easy enough. So far, things have been coming along smoothly. Everybody we asked to play parts said yes, we got the locations, some wonderful friends loaned us some equipment, our family has been supportive, and we captured a lovely sunset from on top of the water tower yesterday. It was an experience. We harnessed ourselves and climbed staight up the center of the tower though a tall tube. When we got to the top we opened the hatch and then connected ourselves to the top of the tower about 150 feet above ground. On top of the tower we have about a 4 foot circle to move around on. All for two seconds of sunset. It was the first time I have ever seen Brent scared and confirmed to us his fear of heights. At one point, I suggested a certain angle and he responded, "How about action and you just start acting," as he gripped the flagpole in one hand and the camera in another. It was "classic" as he says. When we came down I felt closer to him than ever! Back to today, our first full shoot day. We shot at "Junebug's" house, that is my Grandma Webb's house. Junebug is playing the part of the grandma in the movie. We had a ball. Even if the film stinks, I will have some funny memories of Junebug and I cracking up. Our enormous crew of...two...Brent and I set up about 10 am and finished tonight around 10 pm. We did take a 3 hour break to go say hi to the boys and go to the grocery store with my dad. I believe we shot seven scenes today. We took care of the lights, sound, costuming, hair and make-up, continuity, cinematography, directing the actors, ect... I feel like a true "independent" filmmaker...he he...we are not doing anything by the book at this point. Hell...who needs a marker? It's fun and satisfying. The only thing that is missing (besides a buget) is our friends. I look forward to fumbling through the next filmic adventure with a few friends by our sides and on the set!!

Feathery Fun & Fish

2006-12-18T20:23:00.000-08:00

Right now we are in Indiana and will be here for 3 weeks. So far it's great. We got here Saturday and it's been warm, really warm, for December. Today, my mom, sister, Nathanael, Noah and I went to an aquarium in Cincinnati. I love river towns. Looking at them transports me back in time and I start imagining my life as Huck Finn. I also love aquariums. Some people may find them sad and I can understand their point. But since I am afraid of the ocean and would never scuba dive, I enjoy peaking into the other world that makes up most of earth. Saw lots of amazing creatures that one would expect to see at an aquarium.

We got to pet some sharks, they felt a little like a cats tongue.

Santa made an underwater visit.

But the highlight for me was a rain forest exhibit that was filled with, not fish but, Lorikeets. We fed them nectar from little cups. Noah thought they were tops.

Nathanael was nervous thinking they might bite.

I found them funny, full of personality.

Now I want one (along with a penguin), but we have trouble enough finding babysitters for our furry family when traveling, so I don't think that would be wise. Nevertheless they were fun. The boys had a great time and it was fun being with my sister and mom. Now if only we could adjust to the time change.

SORRY

2006-11-17T06:27:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, Noah asked me to play a game with him. I walked into his room and he had spread the contents of the SORRY game all over his bedroom floor. We set it up and began to play. He was actually into the game, only distracted by Sunny, our cat, who he had caught and put on my lap. In the end, it was close. Both of our last pawns were in or nearing the SAFETY ZONE. There would be no reason to switch with an 11 card and the SORRY card was a passed turn, so it was just a matter of being lucky enough to draw the right number to bring our pawns into home. Noah was so excited, certain he was going to win. I began to worry because it really looked like I was going to win. We ran out of cards and I picked them up to shuffle. Should I let him win or should I let him learn it's okay to lose? Being a little brother he already loses a lot. Quickly, I glanced at his pawns, one had seven spaces and the other had one space to move to be in home. I needed three spaces to bring lone pawn into home. I saw if I set the cards down the way they were, I would draw a 3 on my next turn and win. I also saw a one and a 7 near the top. Very discreetly, I put the 1 on top, then a invalid SORRY card, followed by a seven.
"Noey, it's your turn."
He drew a 1 and moved a pawn into HOME. My turn.
"Oh I drew a SORRY card. Can't move. Your turn."
His large baby hand picked up a card. He has to focus to be able to pick on one and not the entire pile.
"Look you drew a 7, count the spaces for you last guy. He's HOME, you won!!!"
Noah jumped up, punched at the air with glee, shouted, "I won, I won!"

I used our game experience later that night in my musical improv class. We had to talk about an event in our day and then sing a chorus that summed it up. My chorus went like this:

Sometimes it's better to lose.
Sometimes it's better to lose.
If you know what's best for you, you will try it too.
Sometimes it's better to lose.

I was actually funny but one those things where you had to be there!!

Advertisment

2006-11-12T22:36:00.000-08:00

Here is the postcard for the short I did at Second City. It was a blast.

Good Friends

2006-11-12T22:18:00.000-08:00

We spent the afternoon with our dear friends, Casson, Anna, and Sammie in Marina del Ray. They just moved back to CA from NYC. It was fun and relaxing to feel the freedom to be ourselves. Later, Anna came with me to watch my improv show at Second City. What a love. Because it was a little "shaky". She also gave me a designer bag she had designed. My first real designer bag and designed by a friend. Anna you are a super love. ;) Nathanael and Noah had fun until they got tired. I had fun until I had to ride home in a messy car with wrappers crackling under my feet.

Army Cat

2006-11-10T14:46:00.000-08:00

Noey were walking through our neighborhood yesterday when he exclaimed, "Look mama there's an army cat!" I looked to where he was pointed and there sat a rather round orange and brown calico cat watching us walk by as if he was guarding his porch. Noey then asked, "Where's his gun?"

"Closed"

2006-11-10T14:16:00.000-08:00

Nathanael had a sale today. Around noon he set up a makeshift table in the back yard with old toys. I mentioned, that I didn't think his chances of getting customers were very high with it set up out back. So he moved it to the front and proceeded using his own marketing techniques such as shouting in a voice laced with annoyance, "I'm having a sale today. Everybody can come." As the minutes wore on and customers didn't flock as expected, Brent overheard him singing a blue-sy song about nobody coming to his sale.
I said a quick prayer asking God to bring a customer. I guess God wanted him to learn more about perseverance than instant success. (I know the frustration that comes with this lesson.) After 1/2 hour, or so, I heard him shouting again with even more annoyance, "That sale is over in ten minutes, if you want to come and buy anything." Then ten minutes later he came in demanding 2 pieces of Halloween candy. I saw there was more going on than wanting Halloween candy and asked what was wrong. His eyes welled up with tears and he said "Nobody is coming to my sale. I yelled that it was going to be over in 10 minutes and nobody came." He continued through his tears, rather defiantly, "Put up a closed sign." Humph...take that!

Skull

2006-11-04T16:05:00.000-08:00

Noey has a small skull about the size of a walnut. It came off of some creepy Halloween necklace my mom bought him. He's obessessed with it. He takes it everywhere, shoves it into his pocket or keeps it gripped in his hand like it's a piece of antiquity. If he miplaces it, he gets this desperate look on his face, the look I would have if I lost my wedding ring . The other night he half woke up crying asking for his skull. I love how kids become obsessed with random objects. A few weeks ago it was little tiny toy shark. I guess adults do the same thing, but usually the objects are a little less unique, unlike the walnut sized plastic skull.

My Affair with the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man

2006-10-28T02:24:00.000-07:00

AT HOME*, we eat healthy or at least what I believe is healthy, basically an organic whole-food kosher diet. Actually, if you know me well, you know I can get a bit obsessive and annoying about food. I'm sure there is a label for my food obsession. Let me elaborate. Almost all the produce I buy is fresh, organic and nutritious, things like corn and iceberg don't count. I try to eat at least one raw fruit or vegetable at every meal. I don't buy white grains only brown. I try to limit the amount of wheat we eat. The majority of our dairy is organic. I buy high omega eggs with "golden" yolks. I'm even considering switching to raw milk. I don't buy pork, shellfish, or dirty fish (they must have scales). My meat is free range and grassfed or at the least kosher. I buy chicken that has been fed a vegetarian diet without antibiotics or hormones. I don't buy farm raised fish, only wild, and won't eat too much b/c of mercury. I think processed sugar substitutes, of all kinds, are dangerous at best. The closest I come to buying processed food are frozen tamales at Trader Joes or spaghetti sauce. I enjoy detoxes and cleanses. I'm skeptical about soy products. I own a $300 wheatgrass juicer. Huge grocery stores, frighten me, I do my best to avoid them. If I am buying something in a jar or box, I practically memorize the labels. And I'm not just looking for hydrogenated oils, I'm looking for any artificial ingredient, color number something, or preservative that I can't pronounce, don't know what it means or sounds like it was made in a lab. You get the point. I'm anal about my food AT HOME*. I should probably get a WWJE bracelet.

But there's a catch.

Don't be fooled by my AT HOME* eating habits. I'm a hypocrite. The problem is sugar or rather my addiction to it. I sabotage all my hard work with sugar. And everyone knows sugar is one of the worst things a person can eat. I need to find a support group because I have all the symptoms of an addict. I lie about eating it. I eat it when I say I don't want it. I go out of my way to get it. I hide evidence. I try not to keep it in my house except in the forms of maple syrup, honey, and agave nectar. When I have been desperate, I have drank over of cup of maple syrup, making myself sick and once half a bottle of agave nectar. There's something not right about that. I have even found myself shaking at the checkout line at Ralph's trying not to buy a Reese's cup or York Peppermint Patty. Once I came home shouting to Brent, "I did it", overjoyed, at my triumph of not buying any candy at Ralph's. Brent said, "Good job Baby!". I said, "I rewarded myself with a People Magazine, it has anorexic stars who don't eat sugar on the cover!!" The last 7 years for Lent, I have given up sugar and I don't think I have ever been 100% successful. One year I ate an entire jar of kid's gummy vitamins to get my fix, citing that it didn't count b/c it wasn't technically candy or a dessert. Sugar is like heroin to me, albeit, killing me slower and the damage to my life is not as evident. The worst part is, I have passed on my addiction to Nathanael. Noah, somehow, seems to have been bypassed. He can eat a cookie and stop or save some for later. But Nathanael, well, he is just as bad as me, except that he is honest and shows no shame. He references candy about 5000 times a day. And I totally empathize with him. When I was a kid there used to be this Dairy Queen commercial where it took the audience's point of view down a chocolate river lined with mountains of ice cream and chocolate covered in candy. That was my ultimate fantasy. Willy Wonka was my hero. The same is true for Nathanael. And I don't know what to do about it. About a year ago, I discovered these books, The Sugar Addicts Total Recovery Guide and Little Sugar Addicts. It was enlightening and Nathanael and I began our journey to recovery. The journey lasted less than a week. I feel like giving up but I don't want to, at least not yet. This week has been bad, as is any time, I eat outside my house. When I go on vacation or go to a party, many of my dietary habits go out the window, especially sugar. I can justify every bite. This week, I have ate part of a 1/2 gallon of Blue Bell ice cream, two pizza cookies with ice cream, Joe-Joes, a gas station cinnamon roll, Ben and Jerry's, a cheesecake brownie, and an enormous bag of marshmallows. And this is just what I can remember off the top of my head. I think my insides are exploding with yeast. Every night I have woke up with a stomach ache, I know because of the food I'm eating, especially sugar. This is why I am typing a blog at 3 a.m. And if it wasn't gone, I'd probably be having a bowl of Blue Bell Turtle Fudge right now. Pathetic.

*This our AT HOME diet only. It's not a religious thing. So, if you invite us over for dinner, we will HAPPILY eat whatever you make without gagging and judgement. ;) And for goodness sake, if we go out to dinner and I order french fries and a coke, don't judge me!

Rock "Me" Like a Hurricane

2006-10-27T16:37:00.000-07:00

Last night I drove to Tucson to see one of my dearest friends, Juliana, who I call Ju-boo. About ten years ago Ju-boo and I drove through Tucson on our way to live in LA for the summer. It was both of our first times living outside of our parents house not on a college campus and the beginning of a friendship that I know will last the rest of our lives. I love her dearly. Ju-boo now lives in Austin but was in Tucson staying at the Hilton El Conquistador Resort for a business trip and I am in Phoenix for vacation. Perfect timing. A few months ago we were lucky enough to be in NYC at the same time too! Anyway we went to Oregano's and then stayed up late talking. It was wonderful.

Unfortunatley, she had to leave early in the morning so our time together was much too short. She left around 6:30 am. Alone in the hotel room I peeked out the drapes. The sun was starting to come up and everything was a mix of Impressionistic colors slightly fuzzy waiting for the warmth and glare of the sun to reveal the details that were hidden in the dawn. I considered going back to sleep because it is rare for me to find time to sleep in. But then realized it was even more rare for me to watch the rocky mountains of Tucson wake up in solidtude. I pulled a blanket off the bed and situated myself in a chair on the balcony with my Bible. The mountains turned from shades of violet and navy blue to a golden hues of tan speckled with green and brown. I love the desert. I find it beautiful. It is so mysterious and sublime. I feel captivated by it's hostility toward man and curious about the creatures who can survive its unforgiving terrain. Okay, I know I'm no Shelley writing about Mont Blanc, but it was gorgeous and peaceful beyond words. So, I read some Psalms and then read Phillippians. That book has really been speaking to me lately. Probably because it is the first and only thing I have read in the Bible in months! The other day Nathanael drew me a drawing with Phillipians 4:13 written on it and since then I keep going back to that book. When the sun had fully risen, I tried to go back to bed unsucessfully. After reading a bit of USA Today I decided to go sit in the spa. The spa was located, along with three other pools, in the center the hotel, a man-made oasis. I sat in the spa chatting with my mom for a while. Then headed over to the pool and read a few chapters from Kitchen Confidential. It's supposed to be a funny memoir about the author's life as a chef. It's okay. After too many pages of few too laughs, I decided to go for a swim. I felt like what one of those beta fish you buy in the tiny little bowls must feel like when they are transferred into a larger tank. The pool was huge and I had it all to myself. I felt small and happy floating while looking at the mountains, doing strokes wtih crappy technique and swimming underwater pretending to be an eel. Finally, before leaving I decided I wanted to go down the 143 foot faux rock waterslide a few times. I walked over to find it closed because there was not an attendant on duty. But if there was no one on duty, then there was no one to catch me. Besides I figured, what would they say, don't do that. It had been along time since I felt so free, like going skinny dipping in highschool with my girlfriends.

After my brief act of civilized rebellion :) I took a shower and packed up to drive back to Phoenix. I have always loved driving on the freeway, but since having kids it has become more often a chore than an escape or therapy. A few more hours of freedom and solitude and I wanted to make the most of it. Driving makes me feel like my cells are opening up, taking a big breath, and shouting "Yeehaw!" or "Rock On!" in earnest. I searched for a Christian station hoping to to stay in a mindset of Jesusy awe, but couldn't find any, at least any I could stomach. So I asked God to speak to me through, heaven forbid, "secular" music. I didn't hear any specifics but I felt freedom and peace from deep within as I barreled down interstate 10 in my Grandpa's Buick. I listened to mostly classic rock and 80's. I did hear Snow Patrols "Chasing Cars" part of it speaks to me on a spritual level. And I one point, I found myself singing the chorus of the Scorpions, "Rock You Like a Hurricane" to God, but with a slight change, "He I am. Rock ME like a hurricane.". Totally dorky, I know. I likened it to asking God to light the fire, which in my opinion, is a pretty wierd thing to ask, although I have and do from time to time. I don't know, but in the moment it felt appriate and I felt up to the challenge. By the way, I'm not claiming that the Scorps are a Godly band by any means, the rest of the lyrics of the song, which I had to look up when I got home, are in my opinion, sad and pathetic. I just feel like, and some may disagree and that okay, God sometimes uses the most unlikely people and things to move us, even the Scorpians. Two hours later, with one almost careless running our of gas incident, I arrived back at the condo happy and cheerful feeling renewed ready to gather my boys and Brent up in my arms.
Tucson Water Parks, Water Park AZ, Pools Tucson Arizona

Shark Car

2006-10-22T01:02:00.000-07:00

shark boy & sugar fiend
Originally uploaded by bnims.

This is an older post that I never got up from October 5th.

This afternoon I took the boys thrift store shopping downtown Ventura. It's a favorite afternoon past time of ours. I like it for numerous reasons: I feel like I'm saving money, recycling, basically, being a B- citizen instead of a C+ one. I love the colorful characters and the conversations I overhear. I can sometimes feel creative while I'm shopping. I love the names: The Salvation Army, Humane Society Thrift Store, Goodwill, Retarded Citizens Thrift Store. Compare those to the boring names like Target, Mervyne's, Macy's, JC Penny's ect. Of course there are things I don't like about thrift stores such as how your hands feel like they are coated with clear chalk afterwards or how the carts always have a sticky wheel or two and rolling over polyester moomoos can be difficult. But then there are the "finds", such as a complete Jr. Scrabble game (I'm not always so lucky, the Operation Game I bought was missing a bone.) or a fantastic vintage Guccie Sweater. One of my all time favorite dresses came from a thrift store in Florida where I paid a dollar a pound. But, back to this afternoon. We were in the first shop we visited when Noah lazered in on a green Razr scooter. This was it. He didn't mind the torn handle bar foam or the rust on the bolts. The store was going to out of business so it half off and was only going to be six dollars...what a steal. Before we paid for it, I reminded him we were going to the store across the street, the one with the "good toys' and if he got the scooter he couldn't get anything else. He agreed. I said,"Are you sure? Because I don't want you to start asking for something else over there." He said he was sure he wanted the scooter. So we paid for it. Speaking of strange characters in thrift stores. The clerk asked me if I had ever seen the Leave It To Beaver movie because Beaver rode the scooter we were buying was in movie. And her son had played Beaver. I asked if he was still an actor, wondering how she ended up working in the thrift store. "No, he is in college now, studying genetics. He wants to cure cancer", she said. What do you say to that? I told her that was great and left wondering if she was crazy. Across the street at the "good toy store", the boys began to rummage through piles of abandoned and discarded toys. I heard Noah shreik with joy. I looked over and he held up this crazy looking half shark-half car thing. In case you don't know, Noah LOVES LOVES LOVES sharks. "A shark car", he said wide eyed with sheer amazement. I watched him look at it longingly, remember what I had said about not asking, and then slowly set it down back on the shelf. It was the look on his face, that revealed he cared more about pleasing me and keeping his word than getting the incredible shark car, that moved me. When it comes to my kids I'm usually not a hard ass, so of course, I said, "Noey, you can go ahead and get that shark car if you want." His face glowed as he reached for it. He couldn't be more content at the moment, but Nathanael was another story. It would be another ten minutes before Nathanael reluctantly decided on a bag army toys. But on the way out, I spotted an Icee maker on a shelf with some vases. I pulled it down and Nathanael's face lit up, at the thought of sugar I assume. Good, two ecstatic little boys. We paid for our purchases and left. As we walked to our car, I felt like Mrs. Thrift Store America with my adoring little fans trailing after me.

Friday in Phoenix

2006-10-21T22:46:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was our first full day in Phoenix. There is so much sky here, it's makes me breath a little easier I think. Yesterday, my dear friend Dawn, came into town for a business trip. We went to Papago park where we had a picnic by a pond. I kept imagining what it would be like to be lost in the desert and then find an oasis, like Alec and Raja in The Black Stallion Returns. This pond reminded me of that part of the movie except there weren't any camels, turbans, horses, men with knives and there were minivans in the parking lot, but aside from that it was similar, I guess. After the picnic we climbed the Hole in the Rock trail where we reached a hole in the top of a huge rock. The boys had lots of fun until....until Nathanael fell down and let the entire park know he was in pain. He then continued to question, rather loudly, why God made rocks. I supose it was because he thought it to be the rocks that caused him to fall not running too fast in the slick bottom Chuck Taylors he insisted on having that he still won't put on himself, but I'm getting on another tangent. After we got down the trail, where along the way I was reminded by my sweet son's screaming voice that he was not going to walk on the rocks anymore (I'm not sure if he thgouht we were going to fly down the trail) we packed up and begin to make our way to Trader Joes. I will never live in a place that doesn't have Trader Joes. Hear that God? Make sure you put one down the street from my tiny little room in the basement of the mansion in heaven. K? But along the way to TJ's we got sidetracked, it happens, by the Goodwill. Dawn who is forever cheerful didn't mind if we made a pit stop. We went in and and came out with a tube top, sari tank top, Batman gun, Matchbox Pirates Cove, and a flyer for the 50% off sale for Saturday. That's another post. By the way, if you are wondering where Brent was during all of this, he was at lunch with a friend from Santa Barbara who was also in town for business. Finally, we made it to TJ's were Dawn cheerfully offered to push Noah in the cart. Except Noah decided he would love on her by spitting, poking, and finally punching to the point Dawn actually started to lose her cheerfulness for about a minute and a half!! We made it home for 30 minutes and then left for Oregano's, a pizzeria we discovered on our last trip out here. Unfortunately, we had to wait an hour even though it wasn't even six o'clock, but I must say, it was worth it. And so are the five pounds I gained.

Butt Fire

2006-10-17T22:30:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Nathanael took a plastic pole from a scary skull ax that daddy had bought from The Big K and started swiping my bum. After about 5 "strikes" from the pole, I asked him what he was doing. "Trying to light your butt on fire", he replied.

the last week and a half

2006-10-17T22:05:00.000-07:00

For me, the problem with blogging is that I want to share what's been going on with us (why I started in the frist place) but when we have a lot going on I don't have time to blog. Much less put the time and energy into writing an entertaining blog. So here is a quick update. The boys are out of school right now for fall break. They had a blast spending time with their weewah and papaw who just left today. Last week was super duper busy for me. I took an improvised movie workshop at Second City. Basically, in five days we created and filmed an improvised short. It was an amazing experience. For me, there is something exhilerating in experiencing the characters and story growing organically through collaberation with the directors and other improvisors. That week I also had an interview with a well known commercial casting director as a personal assistant. I couldn't take the job as she wanted me to work from 9-7 everyday. But I made the contact and she asked me if I would be interested in coming in on an as needed basis. Today, the boys and I went to the library for storytime and then down to a little tiny bakery for cookies. It was one of those perfect mornings where I was easily satisfied with life, nothing like cookies, curious (well-behaved) children, and the smell of libraries.

Leaving Wonderland

2006-10-07T09:12:00.000-07:00

We had the curtain call. All that work for one show!! Overall, it went really well. The songs were a little shaky but I pushed through my fear and just sang!! For me, that was an accomplishment. Nathanael and Noah loved it!!! It was fun to steal glimpses of their little faces during the show, that made it all worth it.

Alice in Voice Lessons

2006-10-04T22:02:00.000-07:00

I had my first rehearsal, where I actually got to get up, for Alice in Wonderland today. I felt really good about it, with one EXCEPTION, the songs. AHHHHH...they felt horrible. The show is the day after tomorrow and, hopefully, I'll get to rehearse one more time. And I'm thinking I'm going to sing the songs more child like rather than "singerly"!! This has actually been a great exercise in discipline for me because I have had to memorize all the dialogue, learn the songs, and the blocking by myself, for the most part. All for just one show. BUT, it will be worth it when I see how happy Nathanael and Noey are after the show!!

My new friend, Zeno

2006-10-04T21:11:00.000-07:00

Okay, so you know how I can be sort of frugal or as some would say cheap? Well the other day I took a deep breath pulled out my plastic and bought a $159 Zeno or zit zapper. "She's" a device that look sort of like a cell phone that has a warm tip that you put on your zit for 2 1/2 minutes twice a day. She is supposed to make it go away in about 24-36 hours instead of 1-2 weeks. Anyway, after using Zeno a few times, I thought to myself, "She is just heat. Why did I pay $159 for a hot plate the size of an erasure tip?" So I plugged in my curling iron and set it to low heat. A few minutes later I started tapping a zit on my chin. I had to tap because it was too hot to set the curling iron on the blemish. At first it really hurt but after a few taps it went numb and so I kept tapping away determined to prove to Zeno she was worth no more than a $9.99 curling iron. Well, later that afternoon, I glanced into my visor mirror and thought, "What the hell is that?" Now instead of a tiny little red pimple, I had a small but shiny blister on top of the pimple. I could just hear Zeno's snickery beeps when I turned her on that night, "I told you so."

B.A. in Cry Babying

2006-10-01T23:22:00.000-07:00

Last night the boys got into an argument. It went something like this:

Nathanael- You're a cry baby Noah.
Noah- I'm not a baby.
Nathanael- A cry baby.
Noah- (louder) I'm not a baby.
Nathanael- Not a baby. A cry baby.
Noah- (esculating anger) I'm not a baby.
Nathanael- You don't know what a cry baby is, you'll have to go to college to learn.

Tea Bags

2006-09-30T14:34:00.000-07:00

I knew blogging was a bad idea.

Rhino

2006-09-30T13:13:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I obsess on things, really obsess on things, even random things, even in my sleep. This was the case the other night. Around 3 am, I half-awoke frustrated and unable to fully wake and unable to fully escape the dream that had been playing over and over in my head. The dream was not a story, it was an image of Zach Braff, that continually dissolved to an image of Brent, then back to Zach and back to Brent. CONTINUOUSLY. Driving me MAD in my sleep. And I kept commenting continuously. "Brent is way better looking than Zach Braff." "Zach Braff looks like an koala with lip injections." Zach Braff looks like lizard with lip injections." " Brent is way better looking than Zach Braff" "Zach Braff looks like a horse with lip injections." "Zach Braff looks like a fish with lip injections." And on and on. In my sleep, I was trying to find the perfect animal comparison to Zach Braff and every animal had lip injections. And until I found that animal, I was not going to be able to quit obssessing. I tried to wake up, but couldn't. I tried to go to sleep but couldn't. I kept, in my half sleep, trying to convince my subconscious that this was about the stupidest dream I could be dreaming. Around 5 am I fell into a deep sleep. The next morning I was exhausted. I spent a few minutes trying to figure out why Zach Braff's face ruined my night. I have never watched Scrubs. I saw Garden State. But that's it. I have never disliked him. I'm still not sure what animal, I think he resembles. I'm leaning towards a rhino. I'm not sure what I had against him that night. I haven't thought about him much since. And I do really think Brent is cuter than Zach Braff. But of course, I'm biased! In my eyes, Brent is the most beautiful man on the planet. Oh yeah, I have gotten a kick out of finding animal resemblences in people since I was a kid. When I was in 4th grade, I wanted to be called mouse. Whatever.

Parable of the Twizzler

2006-09-25T19:55:00.000-07:00

To Nathanael
Sept 18, 2006

Today, I had a “bad mommy moment”. I lied to you. As you know, sugar can make me a bit irrational. After we got home from school, I was sitting in the van because Noey had fallen asleep when suddenly it came, the sugar crave. “Luckily”, I remembered there was a zip lock bag with three Twizzlers sitting on top of the refrigerator just waiting to be consumed. I had been watching them for a few days and figured since no one had asked for them, you and Noah, which ever they belonged to, had forgotten about them. So, I went into the house. Relieved to see they were still on the fridge, I grabbed them and tucked them up under my shirt. Nonchalantly, I went back to the van, where I devoured them as if they were the last waxy sugary licorice sticks, I love so much, on the planet. Satisfied, I went back to reading, “Waiting for Godot.” Wouldn’t you know, about ten minutes later, I hear you coming in distress, down the sidewalk around the corner of the house to the van.
“Mom, do you know where my Twizzlers are? They were on top of the refrigerator?”
“What Twizzlers?”
“They were on top of the refrigerator.”
“You had Twizzlers?”
I wanted to tell you the truth so badly, but inside I panicked. Your big brown eyes were already showing signs of stress and I was afraid that you would throw a tantrum. But most of all, I was deeply embarrassed by my lack of self control and now lie. I didn’t want to expose the sugar monster I was to you and I didn’t want to see the disappointment in your eyes.
“Yeah, they were on top of the refrigerator”, you urgently continued to press.
“I’m not sure. Didn’t the ice cream truck just go by?” I said trying to distract from the missing Twizzlers.
“Yes, Daddy said it wasn’t Sugar Saturday. Why do we have to have Sugar Saturday?”
Relieved you had forgotten the Twizzlers for a second I said quickly, “Why don’t we have a treat later?”
“Okay,” you say and head inside.
Later, when I came in, I went to Daddy’s office and told him what had happened. Of course, he was disappointed and told me it was best to confess my wrong to you. But first, I had to go to 7-eleven to purchase a peace offering, a fresh pack of Twizzlers.
You were sitting on the chair in the living room when I said I need to talk to you. I sat down on the ottoman facing you and said, “Mommy did a bad thing today.”
“What?” you said with a curious smile that was trying not to smile.
“You know when I said I didn’t know where you Twizzlers were? Well I did, and I ate them.”
Without hesitation and ever so earnestly you said, “That’s okay. I forgive you.”
I was moved by your quick willingness to forgive, when I had committed what I knew in your eyes to be a heinous crime, and my eyes began to tear. I pulled out the pack of Twizzlers from 7-eleven and said, “I got these for you to share with your brother.”
Through tears you replied, “That’s okay. You can have them.”
“No sweetie, I got them for you.”
“How much did they cost?” you asked, upset because I was upset.
“About fifty cents.”
“I will give you fifty cents.”
“No sweetie. Mommy was wrong and I want you to have them.”
You smiled a genuine smile of delight and pulled one off and handed it to me. I cannot find the words to express how proud I was of your character at that moment.

Foot In The Mouth

2006-09-18T22:56:00.000-07:00

When I am breaking down a scene for an acting class or an audition, I look for the characters motivation. What is causing them to speak and behave as they do? Well right now, I'm totally clueless as to my motivation for starting a blog. A friend of mine said blogging sometimes felt like a job. What!!! A job!!! Noooo!!! I, like everyone else I know, am pressed for time as it is. Right now, I should be tucked in my bed getting my beauty rest, so I don't have to lay on the couch for ten minutes with cold green tea bags over my eyes trying to get rid of puffiness while my boys snicker and point at me like I have booger the size of a raisin dangling out of my nose. My motivation must be love, I guess. Love for my husband and my boys. If that love gets me writing down stories from their lives, then that's all I need, no one has too ever read it. But if that was my only motivation wouldn't I just keep a journal? So it must be a love from my family and friends. I say "from" instead of "for" because I am blessed to be loved by so many people who might care to know about what happened while I waited 10 minutes to get a sample of penne pasta with mushroom sauce at Trader Joes. And then maybe there's a wee wee bit of self love too, because sometimes, not often, but occasionally, I have a fleeting thought of, "Hey, I am kind of cool even if it's an awkward cool and I can, on rare occasions, be witty!" For those who have heard me criticize blogging...well...I put my foot in my mouth.